So its pushing close to bed time tonight. And as long as the day was I find myself wishing the night wasn't over. Idk if i just had a lot of fun talking last night, or if I still need to talk more, or if I just want to talk for the sake of it, to not feel any more alone.
I saw more of an im conversation between Jaden and Ace that I wanted to tonight... And it bothered me a bit, and thats bothering me a bit, because i've decided that i'm over things and ok with whatever ends up going on or happening between her and him or anyone else...
I don't know if it bothers me more, or the fact that it bothers me bothers me more... But I feel like it bothers me not because I'm the ex, btu because I feel like on a left hand i hear about the uncertainty and the shakey friendship and a laundry list of negatives... but on the right hand when I see and hear and listen and notice them, I feel like its just a completely different story and I worry that maybe she just doesn't see that...
*sighs and shrugs* maybe there'll be time to talk yet tonght, but amybe there won't... I was going to sheepishly ask for a second round of that back rub I got last night... But I don't know that I can really do that anymore...
I suppose I'll just have to wait and see how things go, just like with most other things in life right now, and hope that it goes ok...
I'm decent at that...
Actually rather exceptional at hoping for things... So...
Suppose that'll be it for the night... Finish enjoying this bit of Spiderman 3 and see where or what things go or happen from here.
Gnight all.
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